Frustrated

[mason]

My life just completely sucks right now. I've just had enough. Enough.

 

There is no job in sight for DH. Competition is tight in his field. He's had several promising interviews and then nothing. There hasn't even been anything to apply for in the last few weeks.

 

He used to have either Friday or Saturday's off. But now, since everybody is quitting on them, they're making everybody work 6 days a week. So the only day he gets off is Sunday. The rest of the week, he is gone. Gone from 6:30 until 7...sometimes later. He's a slave. He's not making any money. They have him on commission and they tweaked the payplan so you can't make any money unless you literally screw people over. yes, they've directly told him to do that. If he doesn't, he gets penalized financially. Nice.

 

So I am on my own with four kids. I really feel like a single mother, I'm doing this on my own. I nearly lost it when DH informed me the other day that he had to work Saturday. I was having a really bad day with Jacob and I just kept telling myself all day "just have to make it 'til Saturday, hang in there until Saturday". Not to mention we had PLANS Saturday. And now I have to manage Jacob at a party by myself. I am dreading it. Dreading it.

 

We're barely scraping by right now. Barely. At this rate, we cannot afford our house. Or the taxes, or the utilituies.

We will most likely lose our home. There's just nothing we can do about it. So much for all that credit repair, huh? I can't even go there because it will just get me too angry....

 

Last month, DH had to turn in his company car because it reached it's mileage limit. That leaves me trapped in my house with no car, 6 days a week, 6 nights a week....with an out of control toddler that needs desperately to get out of the house.

 

Due to the car situation, I can't even get a job to help out our finances. Not like it would be much, by the time I paid for day care, but it might be something. I'm depending on my parents to run the kids around to practice or whatever they need a ride for. That ticks me off. It shouldn't be their problem and it just kills me to have to burden them with it. And nothing sucks more than sitting around waiting for somebody to pick you up. And waiting, and waiting. It's like I'm 15 again.

 

I. cannot. stand. being. stuck. in. this. house. without. a. car. ESPECIALLY now that the weather is getting nice. My biggest fear is that I will have no car over the summer. The thought just makes my stomach twist in knots.

 

I have just had enough. When this all started I just thought it would be temporary. He'll find a job soon....we just have to tighten the budget for a few months.....but now I'm just losing hope. I'm afraid we're stuck here and there is no way out.

 

That is all.

[brazen]

[NeverQuietHere]

(((hugs)))

 

I know about the car situation. Been stuck with one car since August 2007. With 4 kids, it's not fun being stuck in a house with a SMALL yard and no means of going anywhere. I can completely sympathize.

[tmkats]

I'm sorry you are going through this.

 

((((((((((HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG))))))))))))

[orangecrush]

Sending good vibes your way.

[Marilie]

(((((((((mason))))))))))

[mdw2006]

{{{{hugs}}}}

 

now if I remember your dh works in the car sales industry right?

 

Has he thought about doing a different type of job? I know that you like to work in your field but maybe a different job he could be working norma hours and bringing home a paycheck.

 

or how about him being a stay home dad and you work full time?

 

Are you getting a tax refund? Can you use that toward a good cheap car?

 

Just some thoughts.

[Jen23514]

(((Hugs))) Sending good vibes your way as well.

 

Hang in there.....

[Snork Maiden]

((Mason)). Can you get a friend to babysit J for the party? Or just to get out?

 

It took Rom 6 months to find a job, and he spent blocks of hours applying, calling, following up, writing cover letters, and tailoring his resume for various jobs. And the one he got is an iffy one currently. He'd thought it would take a couple weeks, tops, and was looking forward to his 'off' time. 6 months later, not so much. I've been looking around, and sending out a few resumes a week, and I got nothin. And I can't even say there's a whole lot of great stuff out there to apply for. The car thing really blows. Can you manage to drop him off and pick him up? Any public transport? May be just a couple days a week?

 

The house thing blows. I knew some shady Russians in Norcal who extended the whole foreclosure thing by couple years.. But I don't know much about it. May be someone else does?

[giraffy]

Can you take H to work sometimes, and pick him up, so you'll have use of the car? I know it's a lot of back and forth, but there were MANY years that we shared a car, and sometimes we did that?

[brazen]

Can you take H to work sometimes, and pick him up, so you'll have use of the car? I know it's a lot of back and forth, but there were MANY years that we shared a car, and sometimes we did that?

We did too. PITA but worth it two days a week to get errands or other stuff done to get out of the house.

[sillyviolet]

Hugs. Sorry things are so rough for you right now. Good luck in getting everything resolved. I would agree with the other posts about taking DH to work so you can get the car a few days a week. It might do loads for your sanity.

[mason]

{{{{hugs}}}}

 

now if I remember your dh works in the car sales industry right?

 

Has he thought about doing a different type of job? I know that you like to work in your field but maybe a different job he could be working norma hours and bringing home a paycheck.

 

or how about him being a stay home dad and you work full time?

 

Are you getting a tax refund? Can you use that toward a good cheap car?

 

Just some thoughts.

 

Yes, he works at a car dealership. He's applied for several jobs that were kind of in a related field or not necessarily what he's used to but nothing has come of it.

Tax refund was already spent keeping our one and only vehicle from the repo-man. What was left paid bills already.

 

((Mason)). Can you get a friend to babysit J for the party? Or just to get out?

 

It took Rom 6 months to find a job, and he spent blocks of hours applying, calling, following up, writing cover letters, and tailoring his resume for various jobs. And the one he got is an iffy one currently. He'd thought it would take a couple weeks, tops, and was looking forward to his 'off' time. 6 months later, not so much. I've been looking around, and sending out a few resumes a week, and I got nothin. And I can't even say there's a whole lot of great stuff out there to apply for. The car thing really blows. Can you manage to drop him off and pick him up? Any public transport? May be just a couple days a week?

 

The house thing blows. I knew some shady Russians in Norcal who extended the whole foreclosure thing by couple years.. But I don't know much about it. May be someone else does?

 

That's the thing that stinks with him working these ridiculous hours, he doesn't even have time to work on resumes and all the leg work involved. I told him today that we need to sit down tonight and get some of it organized and I can work on some of it tomorrow like maybe printing and filling envelopes and stuff.

 

Can you take H to work sometimes, and pick him up, so you'll have use of the car? I know it's a lot of back and forth, but there were MANY years that we shared a car, and sometimes we did that?

 

I would only do that if there was a major reason that I needed the car. He works 30 minutes away and taking him to work would wind up having DD late for school. Plus with the cost of gas we really can't afford to do that all the time. Years ago we had to share a car and he worked much closer to home so it made it somewhat do-able. However, if I get desperate enough for some time out of here I just might do it once or twice.

[mdw2006]

That is right, darn repo-man.

 

Has he thought of working something totally not in his field, just for a while till something in his field opens up. Heck working at Wal-mart would probably give him more normal hous then he has now.

 

 

{{{{hugs}}}}

[butterflywings]

Why not get an overnight job? That is what the next door neighbors had to do. He works days and she works nights and they had a 4 year old at the time. Yes it sucked she had to stay awake for him but she napped when he napped and if he didnt nap she would go to bed when her dh got home from work.

 

I would not even go there about losing the house before you went out and got a job first! That's always the plan with dh and I.

 

I think you should do whatever it takes and step up here, not only to save your situation but to save YOU. You need to get out of that house, and you can get by on less sleep than you think.

[Tigz]

(((((Mason)))))

 

Just remember that it is darkest before the dawn.

 

Never give up hope.

 

I'll keep praying for you and yours. I know that there has to be something out there for your DH and possibly for you too. But I know how hard it is to find that needle in a haystack, but there is one there, I promise you.

[mason]

That is right, darn repo-man.

 

Has he thought of working something totally not in his field, just for a while till something in his field opens up. Heck working at Wal-mart would probably give him more normal hous then he has now.

 

 

{{{{hugs}}}}

 

Yea, he's open to that. We need to keep our health insurance though. A Walmart type job won't cut it. Ds is on anti-seizure meds that are over $100 a month....

 

Why not get an overnight job? That is what the next door neighbors had to do. He works days and she works nights and they had a 4 year old at the time. Yes it sucked she had to stay awake for him but she napped when he napped and if he didnt nap she would go to bed when her dh got home from work.

 

I would not even go there about losing the house before you went out and got a job first! That's always the plan with dh and I.

 

I think you should do whatever it takes and step up here, not only to save your situation but to save YOU. You need to get out of that house, and you can get by on less sleep than you think.

 

That's something to consider. I don't know how I'd make it work, though. I would never get a chance to sleep. maybe an hour or two a day if that. Plus, I would have to be home by 6:30 when DH leaves for work.

[Labyrinthine]

That is right, darn repo-man.

 

Has he thought of working something totally not in his field, just for a while till something in his field opens up. Heck working at Wal-mart would probably give him more normal hous then he has now.

 

 

{{{{hugs}}}}

 

Yea, he's open to that. We need to keep our health insurance though. A Walmart type job won't cut it. Ds is on anti-seizure meds that are over $100 a month....

 

Why not get an overnight job? That is what the next door neighbors had to do. He works days and she works nights and they had a 4 year old at the time. Yes it sucked she had to stay awake for him but she napped when he napped and if he didnt nap she would go to bed when her dh got home from work.

 

I would not even go there about losing the house before you went out and got a job first! That's always the plan with dh and I.

 

I think you should do whatever it takes and step up here, not only to save your situation but to save YOU. You need to get out of that house, and you can get by on less sleep than you think.

 

That's something to consider. I don't know how I'd make it work, though. I would never get a chance to sleep. maybe an hour or two a day if that. Plus, I would have to be home by 6:30 when DH leaves for work.

 

I can't offer much but support. I have been there, don that with this job market. Yeah, I was looking forward to my "off time" too. Almost two years late that got real freaking old. Turns out, looking for work is a full time job that has crappy benefits and does NOT pay well.

 

As for DS and his medication, all I have is advice. If DH takes another job that doesn't offer insurance right away, there is a program that few people know of. It is called Bridges to Access. It provides life sustaining medication (anti-seizures definitely qualify) to people who have no insurance and cannot afford it. Your doctor would just need to fill out some forms and the pharma sends you the meds. I have a good friend who has been on this program for years because all her anti-seizures etc would cost her about $700 a month and she has no insurance and works for min. wage. Might be able to help for awhile so DH could take another job. It isn't ideal, but it is something.

 

On the job front, things will get better. Jobs are always the last to recover but there are signs that even they are starting to get better in most places. I wish you luck, you will prevail.

[butterflywings]

Are you doing any surveys? Which ones have you signed up with? Like today, Im doing a survey for an hour for $50, and I have two more lined up with them too. And I have another series of 3 surveys lined up for $50 each. Im signed up with so many survey companies I cant even tell you which survey company is hosting which of these surveys. It stinks that today's survey is at 3am my time (it's interactive) but thems the breaks.

 

Im telling you surveys can make a difference and at least fill in a gap here and there. This may sound like a looney suggestion but what about doing some babysitting during the day? The extra kids may entertain your youngest and keep him fully occupied since his siblings are all in school, plus he will be in some form of school in about 4-5 months or so come August or whenever your school system starts up. Then you will be freed to get a full time job during the day. Even a walmart job that starts out about $9 will maybe fill in the gap of what your dh used to make and makes now.

 

But I implore you to not allow your house to go into foreclosure before you alone bring in some money!!! You may never forgive yourself for that and your dh could eventually resent that. Being a stay at home mom is a luxury not a requirement for kids and it is contingent on being able to get by on one income. Couples all the time work separate shifts or the wife babysits during the day like some women I know do. Your dh needs you! Let me ask, do you have any substantial personal debt you are paying that is only in your name? Maybe you could file a single BK and relieve some of that debt.

[mason]

I can't offer much but support. I have been there, don that with this job market. Yeah, I was looking forward to my "off time" too. Almost two years late that got real freaking old. Turns out, looking for work is a full time job that has crappy benefits and does NOT pay well.

 

As for DS and his medication, all I have is advice. If DH takes another job that doesn't offer insurance right away, there is a program that few people know of. It is called Bridges to Access. It provides life sustaining medication (anti-seizures definitely qualify) to people who have no insurance and cannot afford it. Your doctor would just need to fill out some forms and the pharma sends you the meds. I have a good friend who has been on this program for years because all her anti-seizures etc would cost her about $700 a month and she has no insurance and works for min. wage. Might be able to help for awhile so DH could take another job. It isn't ideal, but it is something.

 

On the job front, things will get better. Jobs are always the last to recover but there are signs that even they are starting to get better in most places. I wish you luck, you will prevail.

 

Thanks, I'll keep that in mind if we get to that point. I didn't know about that program.

 

Are you doing any surveys? Which ones have you signed up with? Like today, Im doing a survey for an hour for $50, and I have two more lined up with them too. And I have another series of 3 surveys lined up for $50 each. Im signed up with so many survey companies I cant even tell you which survey company is hosting which of these surveys. It stinks that today's survey is at 3am my time (it's interactive) but thems the breaks.

 

Im telling you surveys can make a difference and at least fill in a gap here and there. This may sound like a looney suggestion but what about doing some babysitting during the day? The extra kids may entertain your youngest and keep him fully occupied since his siblings are all in school, plus he will be in some form of school in about 4-5 months or so come August or whenever your school system starts up. Then you will be freed to get a full time job during the day. Even a walmart job that starts out about $9 will maybe fill in the gap of what your dh used to make and makes now.

 

But I implore you to not allow your house to go into foreclosure before you alone bring in some money!!! You may never forgive yourself for that and your dh could eventually resent that. Being a stay at home mom is a luxury not a requirement for kids and it is contingent on being able to get by on one income. Couples all the time work separate shifts or the wife babysits during the day like some women I know do. Your dh needs you! Let me ask, do you have any substantial personal debt you are paying that is only in your name? Maybe you could file a single BK and relieve some of that debt.

 

I did start doing the surveys and signed up for the mystery shopping. I gave up on the survey's, though, because it felt like a huge waste of time for the money....like a buck for taking 30 minutes to fill out a survey? And as soon as I get in the middle of something like that, jacob starts acting up because he can tell that I'm in the middle of something.

 

I may start doing some mystery shopping. But again, that's limited because I would have to wait and do it when DH is home and that's not often enough to make much $$ out of it. I may just do it, though, for a little spending cash.

[Nostromo]

I hope things get better for you soon, Mason.

[butterflywings]

I can't offer much but support. I have been there, don that with this job market. Yeah, I was looking forward to my "off time" too. Almost two years late that got real freaking old. Turns out, looking for work is a full time job that has crappy benefits and does NOT pay well.

 

As for DS and his medication, all I have is advice. If DH takes another job that doesn't offer insurance right away, there is a program that few people know of. It is called Bridges to Access. It provides life sustaining medication (anti-seizures definitely qualify) to people who have no insurance and cannot afford it. Your doctor would just need to fill out some forms and the pharma sends you the meds. I have a good friend who has been on this program for years because all her anti-seizures etc would cost her about $700 a month and she has no insurance and works for min. wage. Might be able to help for awhile so DH could take another job. It isn't ideal, but it is something.

 

On the job front, things will get better. Jobs are always the last to recover but there are signs that even they are starting to get better in most places. I wish you luck, you will prevail.

 

Thanks, I'll keep that in mind if we get to that point. I didn't know about that program.

 

Are you doing any surveys? Which ones have you signed up with? Like today, Im doing a survey for an hour for $50, and I have two more lined up with them too. And I have another series of 3 surveys lined up for $50 each. Im signed up with so many survey companies I cant even tell you which survey company is hosting which of these surveys. It stinks that today's survey is at 3am my time (it's interactive) but thems the breaks.

 

Im telling you surveys can make a difference and at least fill in a gap here and there. This may sound like a looney suggestion but what about doing some babysitting during the day? The extra kids may entertain your youngest and keep him fully occupied since his siblings are all in school, plus he will be in some form of school in about 4-5 months or so come August or whenever your school system starts up. Then you will be freed to get a full time job during the day. Even a walmart job that starts out about $9 will maybe fill in the gap of what your dh used to make and makes now.

 

But I implore you to not allow your house to go into foreclosure before you alone bring in some money!!! You may never forgive yourself for that and your dh could eventually resent that. Being a stay at home mom is a luxury not a requirement for kids and it is contingent on being able to get by on one income. Couples all the time work separate shifts or the wife babysits during the day like some women I know do. Your dh needs you! Let me ask, do you have any substantial personal debt you are paying that is only in your name? Maybe you could file a single BK and relieve some of that debt.

 

I did start doing the surveys and signed up for the mystery shopping. I gave up on the survey's, though, because it felt like a huge waste of time for the money....like a buck for taking 30 minutes to fill out a survey? And as soon as I get in the middle of something like that, jacob starts acting up because he can tell that I'm in the middle of something.

 

I may start doing some mystery shopping. But again, that's limited because I would have to wait and do it when DH is home and that's not often enough to make much $$ out of it. I may just do it, though, for a little spending cash.

 

I ignore those surveys.

[squirrelgirl]

(((mason)))

 

I'm sorry - sending good vibes your way.

[squirrelgirl]

I can't offer much but support. I have been there, don that with this job market. Yeah, I was looking forward to my "off time" too. Almost two years late that got real freaking old. Turns out, looking for work is a full time job that has crappy benefits and does NOT pay well.

 

As for DS and his medication, all I have is advice. If DH takes another job that doesn't offer insurance right away, there is a program that few people know of. It is called Bridges to Access. It provides life sustaining medication (anti-seizures definitely qualify) to people who have no insurance and cannot afford it. Your doctor would just need to fill out some forms and the pharma sends you the meds. I have a good friend who has been on this program for years because all her anti-seizures etc would cost her about $700 a month and she has no insurance and works for min. wage. Might be able to help for awhile so DH could take another job. It isn't ideal, but it is something.

 

On the job front, things will get better. Jobs are always the last to recover but there are signs that even they are starting to get better in most places. I wish you luck, you will prevail.

 

Thanks, I'll keep that in mind if we get to that point. I didn't know about that program.

 

Are you doing any surveys? Which ones have you signed up with? Like today, Im doing a survey for an hour for $50, and I have two more lined up with them too. And I have another series of 3 surveys lined up for $50 each. Im signed up with so many survey companies I cant even tell you which survey company is hosting which of these surveys. It stinks that today's survey is at 3am my time (it's interactive) but thems the breaks.

 

Im telling you surveys can make a difference and at least fill in a gap here and there. This may sound like a looney suggestion but what about doing some babysitting during the day? The extra kids may entertain your youngest and keep him fully occupied since his siblings are all in school, plus he will be in some form of school in about 4-5 months or so come August or whenever your school system starts up. Then you will be freed to get a full time job during the day. Even a walmart job that starts out about $9 will maybe fill in the gap of what your dh used to make and makes now.

 

But I implore you to not allow your house to go into foreclosure before you alone bring in some money!!! You may never forgive yourself for that and your dh could eventually resent that. Being a stay at home mom is a luxury not a requirement for kids and it is contingent on being able to get by on one income. Couples all the time work separate shifts or the wife babysits during the day like some women I know do. Your dh needs you! Let me ask, do you have any substantial personal debt you are paying that is only in your name? Maybe you could file a single BK and relieve some of that debt.

 

I did start doing the surveys and signed up for the mystery shopping. I gave up on the survey's, though, because it felt like a huge waste of time for the money....like a buck for taking 30 minutes to fill out a survey? And as soon as I get in the middle of something like that, jacob starts acting up because he can tell that I'm in the middle of something.

 

I may start doing some mystery shopping. But again, that's limited because I would have to wait and do it when DH is home and that's not often enough to make much $$ out of it. I may just do it, though, for a little spending cash.

 

I ignore those surveys.

 

Maybe I've missed something, but honestly, what site are you on that pays $50 for surveys? I've been on all these sites for 2 years and I think the most I've ever earned for one is $10.

[butterflywings]

I can't offer much but support. I have been there, don that with this job market. Yeah, I was looking forward to my "off time" too. Almost two years late that got real freaking old. Turns out, looking for work is a full time job that has crappy benefits and does NOT pay well.

 

As for DS and his medication, all I have is advice. If DH takes another job that doesn't offer insurance right away, there is a program that few people know of. It is called Bridges to Access. It provides life sustaining medication (anti-seizures definitely qualify) to people who have no insurance and cannot afford it. Your doctor would just need to fill out some forms and the pharma sends you the meds. I have a good friend who has been on this program for years because all her anti-seizures etc would cost her about $700 a month and she has no insurance and works for min. wage. Might be able to help for awhile so DH could take another job. It isn't ideal, but it is something.

 

On the job front, things will get better. Jobs are always the last to recover but there are signs that even they are starting to get better in most places. I wish you luck, you will prevail.

 

Thanks, I'll keep that in mind if we get to that point. I didn't know about that program.

 

Are you doing any surveys? Which ones have you signed up with? Like today, Im doing a survey for an hour for $50, and I have two more lined up with them too. And I have another series of 3 surveys lined up for $50 each. Im signed up with so many survey companies I cant even tell you which survey company is hosting which of these surveys. It stinks that today's survey is at 3am my time (it's interactive) but thems the breaks.

 

Im telling you surveys can make a difference and at least fill in a gap here and there. This may sound like a looney suggestion but what about doing some babysitting during the day? The extra kids may entertain your youngest and keep him fully occupied since his siblings are all in school, plus he will be in some form of school in about 4-5 months or so come August or whenever your school system starts up. Then you will be freed to get a full time job during the day. Even a walmart job that starts out about $9 will maybe fill in the gap of what your dh used to make and makes now.

 

But I implore you to not allow your house to go into foreclosure before you alone bring in some money!!! You may never forgive yourself for that and your dh could eventually resent that. Being a stay at home mom is a luxury not a requirement for kids and it is contingent on being able to get by on one income. Couples all the time work separate shifts or the wife babysits during the day like some women I know do. Your dh needs you! Let me ask, do you have any substantial personal debt you are paying that is only in your name? Maybe you could file a single BK and relieve some of that debt.

 

I did start doing the surveys and signed up for the mystery shopping. I gave up on the survey's, though, because it felt like a huge waste of time for the money....like a buck for taking 30 minutes to fill out a survey? And as soon as I get in the middle of something like that, jacob starts acting up because he can tell that I'm in the middle of something.

 

I may start doing some mystery shopping. But again, that's limited because I would have to wait and do it when DH is home and that's not often enough to make much $$ out of it. I may just do it, though, for a little spending cash.

 

I ignore those surveys.

 

Maybe I've missed something, but honestly, what site are you on that pays $50 for surveys? I've been on all these sites for 2 years and I think the most I've ever earned for one is $10.

 

I guess you have then. The survey companies I belong to are valued opinions, surveysavvy, mindfield, surveyspot and pinecone, if Ive missed any Ive listed my list of survey sites so many times on here... My dh asked me this morning which company these surveys were through and I told him I do so many surveys I dont keep tabs. I know some women on slickdeals do keep very close tabs to make sure they are credited and I feel foolish that with this high money value that I didn't keep better tabs because now I dont know which survey company to be mad at if I dont get credited. Im going to be more careful in the future.

 

Just a couple weeks ago I did an interactive discussion on tampons (sorry ) and got $25 for it. And that was just a discussion board I had to log into once a day for several days and talk about tampons.

 

A lot of people make a lot more money than me on surveys. I don't do cheap surveys and I dont do sweepstakes; though I do do a lot of product tests for free because the products are worth some decent enough money. Last week I got a large bottle of moisturizer and got 3 bottles of men's cologne to smell to see if I liked, and this week I did a survey where Im going to get a free box of cereal. Oh, and last week I got like 4 bottles of flavored water.

 

So for me surveys are worth it. As for why you haven't gotten $50 surveys before I don't know why. but why do some people get tons of pinecone surveys a month and I only get a few. Those are the breaks of surveys.