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Why does my life suck.

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I work, I make good money for a 26 yr old. Made 64k 2020, 73k 2019, 60k 2018, and I have had more then 8 cars and that is a lot for a 26 yr old and no one has helped me financially or anything. I don’t buy things a lot that is not my style as in I rarely go shopping for anything. I did buy new shoes recently which costed $120 and I haven’t bought new shoes since I was 21 and I also bought my first pair of blue jeans in a long time just to try and dress up. Objects don’t simply make me happy :(.
 

 

I thought until the midnight of December 31st where I thought I found someone I liked where she said I liked you but I see you more as a friend which killed my mood totally. I just blurred it out that I told her at 11:40 pm that I see her more then a friend and that I had loved her. I had known her for more then a yr n a half and I thought I would open up to her. Now I feel broken, I mean she still said we can be friends etc but that sucks though. She was supportive through the years I knew her that’s why I became attached to her and of course she’s beautiful and she’s been single for more then 10 yrs which is what I don’t get. I would stay at her house until like 1pm or 2pm at nights and I thought we were getting along. I feel like life sucks even though I know people have worse then me. 

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This is commonly a time of year after holidays that many people can experience depression or anxiety.  I am truly sorry for the unfortunate situation you found yourself in.  It maybe hard to believe but thing will be better.and I met my spouse on a blind date over 30 years ago.  I would give my life for him. I'm late in my sixtyth decade and we are stronger than ever.  I was 3o when this happened.  

 

I doubt my words are consolation but we all on here wish you the very best!

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Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, MarvBear said:

This is commonly a time of year after holidays that many people can experience depression or anxiety.  I am truly sorry for the unfortunate situation you found yourself in.  It maybe hard to believe but thing will be better.and I met my spouse on a blind date over 30 years ago.  I would give my life for him. I'm late in my sixtyth decade and we are stronger than ever.  I was 3o when this happened.  

 

I doubt my words are consolation but we all on here wish you the very best!

Thank you for your kind words but I still have feelings left for her and it sucks that she doesn’t want to move on in a way I want to move on forward with her :( it’s so hard to find a decent person in this time and I thought I found someone special which I still believe she is, someone who fills my empty feelings in this world with happiness. I guess I can be glad that we can still be friends.

Edited by helpmeout

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I had a couple of devastating disappointments in my 20s as well.  I look back now, and it's very clear that life turned out the way it was supposed to anyway.  :) 

 

It'll take you a while to get over this, which is normal.  Just hang on and be ready for the right opportunity when it presents itself, because it will.

 

Happy new year.  

 

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6 hours ago, cv91915 said:

I had a couple of devastating disappointments in my 20s as well.  I look back now, and it's very clear that life turned out the way it was supposed to anyway.  :) 

 

It'll take you a while to get over this, which is normal.  Just hang on and be ready for the right opportunity when it presents itself, because it will.

 

Happy new year.  

 

Yeah your right. Atleast she told me it’s not a definite no so there’s hope left. A bit bummed but what can I do.

 

Happy New Years

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Many years ago, I dated a widow with several young sons. She wanted to get married right away, but I wanted to wait about a year for career advancement since I was working in a supervisor that I despised. When she didn't get an engagement ring on Valentine's day, without advance notice, she sold her house, quit her job, and moved away. I was less than pleased.

Life moved on - I got the job I wanted 10 months later and things slowly evolved towards the better. She contacted me a few years later and wanted to pick up where she walked out. I said no [if she was willing to run out once, she'd likely do it again]. She reportedly did the same thing to a couple of other men.

Now, her sons are adults, but one of them turned into a child molester and is serving 30+ years and she's spent her family's wealth trying to keep/get him out of prison, even to this day. The crimes were so disgusting that I hope he never gets out. Had we gotten married, I would have walked out on her for blindly supporting him. 

One never knows what will be, but things can always get worse. Be grateful that they aren't.

 

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I feel sad right now tbh like nothing I do is ever right :(. Friends leave, I lose people I love, and i just had a car accident yesterday because I am not right. My truck has a huge dent now and my truck front bumper is destroyed. :( She texted/called me making sure I was fine but inside I am dead right now like nothing is left in my life that can go right. I don’t know anymore what to do.

https://m.imgur.com/a/UImVTAC

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2 hours ago, helpmeout said:

I feel sad right now tbh like nothing I do is ever right :(. Friends leave, I lose people I love, and i just had a car accident yesterday because I am not right. My truck has a huge dent now and my truck front bumper is destroyed. :( She texted/called me making sure I was fine but inside I am dead right now like nothing is left in my life that can go right. I don’t know anymore what to do.

https://m.imgur.com/a/UImVTAC

Yeah, that sucks but stuff happens. To everyone. Doesn't mean you are "not right."  I can't know what you would find meaning and happiness in but I do know it isn't making a lot of money. Rather, it's doing things you enjoy and can share. You may find that doing things you are good at may be of help to others who aren't so good at those things.  Look for them and help them. It's really a good feeling when you can help someone else out. Humans prosper when we find ways to help each other.

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Bad things always cluster together.  That's the bad news. 

 

The good news is, if they didn't, life would suck a little bit all of the time.  :)

 

That was just a feeble attempt at humor. 

 

The important thing is you weren't badly injured, or worse.  Hang in there.  Better times are ahead.

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2 hours ago, cv91915 said:

Bad things always cluster together.  That's the bad news. 

 

The good news is, if they didn't, life would suck a little bit all of the time.  :)

 

That was just a feeble attempt at humor. 

 

The important thing is you weren't badly injured, or worse.  Hang in there.  Better times are ahead.

Hmm. I sorta got kind of anxious when she said be happy your okay and nobody died, I wish I was. I know this forum or any forum is against self harm but I really feel like I have nothing to live for, I feel like sometimes my existence is a joke. 

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Please don't talk that way. We are not equipped to offer mental assistance nor support. We can only offer you our most sincere sympathies and best wishes for a wonderful future. If the commentary veers off into a self harm trajectory I will need to close the topic.

Hold your head up high. Be proud of who you are and realize you are worth 110% and don't settle for less.

God bless you my friend.

Sent from my SM-P580 using Tapatalk
 

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Treat yourself well, always. Even if one gets the love of their life you must always love yourself during the good and bad times. May sound corny but it is very true.

 

When I was extremely low what helped me when I thought I had nothing was creating a gratitude jar. Every single day I wrote down on a small note something positive that happened during the day. Afterwards I folded the note and placed it in a jar. It really uplifted and changed my thinking pattern. Before I did this, I only dwelled on what was missing out of my life. 

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On 1/5/2021 at 11:57 AM, helpmeout said:

I feel sad right now tbh like nothing I do is ever right :(. Friends leave, I lose people I love, and i just had a car accident yesterday because I am not right. My truck has a huge dent now and my truck front bumper is destroyed. :( She texted/called me making sure I was fine but inside I am dead right now like nothing is left in my life that can go right. I don’t know anymore what to do.

https://m.imgur.com/a/UImVTAC

 

I'm replying because I feel I can loosely relate ...

 

40 years ago I was 21.  So, yeah, likely more than a bit less mature than you are now; but I think there are some salient points to share, nonetheless.

 

I was in a relationship with a women I met in college 4 years before, and with whom I had started dating 18 mo previous, and subsequently proposed 8 mo later and then followed her 1/3 the way across the country when she accepted her first job out of college.

 

6 mo after the move, she broke up with me.  I didn't see it coming and wasn't prepared for it. 

 

Circumstances were such that I didn't move out immediately (in short order, I had a job change and my father was diagnosed with terminal cancer and malingered unconscious for 3 months after surgery before passing).  We continued to share a bed (without "benefits", if you set aside a couple of "desperate" incidents).

 

------------

 

The point I want to share is that during those 6 mo, and for sometime after, my love was unabated.  That period was one of my most tortured of my life, and my psyche has never been so abused and battered (my own doing).

 

I know you'll tell yourself that you'll become reconciled to the fact that a romantic relationship isn't in the cards .... but I don't think you'll succeed in that (at least not anytime soon).   You're going to want more and that "wanting" will show through and jeopardize the friendship that you dearly value.

 

I suggest that for a 6-mo to 1-year period you commit to distancing yourself as much as possible.  When you do see her, do it in circumstances that don't resemble those you might find yourself in were you dating.  (I'm suggesting arranging for others to be around when you do meet up with her.)  Explain your behavior so that she understands exactly where you are and what your intent is.  Ideally, she'll understand that it's best if she refrain form any gestures that might be misinterpreted and/or be uncomfortable for you.

 

Take this time to work hard on self-affirmation.  Focus strongly on those activities that make you feel strong about yourself.  Seek out some type of social group that gives you a substitute for the loss in time that you formerly spent with this friend. 

 

Most important, during this very stressful period, get referred to a strong psychologist or counselor so that you have a trained sounding board for all of the frustrations, anxieties, and sadness and work with them to refocus the energy involved into more constructive avenues that are much more fulfilling.

 

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Posted (edited)

I’m bout to say good bye to my crush 😔😔 for a month until feb 1st because I need to see if I can better myself for a month without seeing or hearing her :( although it will hurt me. If she doesn’t want to see anymore I’ll be hurt but it has to be done because I’m hurting inside talking to her and going to her house but not being with her :(. Wish me luck all.

Edited by helpmeout

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3 hours ago, helpmeout said:

I’m bout to say good bye to my crush 😔😔 for a month until feb 1st because I need to see if I can better myself for a month without seeing or hearing her :( although it will hurt me. If she doesn’t want to see anymore I’ll be hurt but it has to be done because I’m hurting inside talking to her and going to her house but not being with her :(. Wish me luck all.

Good to hear from you and glad you're taking positive steps.

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OMG I hate my life more now. She got mad at me like it was my fault when I told her not to contact me, not to call me until Jan 30th that it shattered my heart and She told me to get out of her house and screamed at me :(. I told her this not good bye but she did not take it well and she cried. I’m mad at myself for bringing that up but it had to but said. 

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On 1/8/2021 at 5:20 AM, helpmeout said:

OMG I hate my life more now. She got mad at me like it was my fault when I told her not to contact me, not to call me until Jan 30th that it shattered my heart and She told me to get out of her house and screamed at me :(. I told her this not good bye but she did not take it well and she cried. I’m mad at myself for bringing that up but it had to but said. 

 

If she isn't sensitive to your needs, but only concerned with her own, it's not promising for a future relationship.  Be patient, but also prepare yourself accordingly.

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11 hours ago, hdporter said:

 

If she isn't sensitive to your needs, but only concerned with her own, it's not promising for a future relationship.  Be patient, but also prepare yourself accordingly.

I just hate how she reacted yet we weren't were in a relationship. :( I don't get how she reacted. I thought she was gonna be like okay and not get angry. I am probably going to lose her. I will see because I will contact her on the 19th and see if she wants to see me on the 20th.

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