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scott31337

My wife's friend got a First Premier card/can't budget/keeps doing broke habits. Anything I can do to steer her?

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Good day.

My wife's friend/bridesmaid (B) (her age as well, 34ish, went to high school together) keeps doing broke people stuff.

We've known her credit has been bad for a while, and even around a year ago we offered to make her an AU to help rebuild and look over her credit report, she passed.

Now she's about to get evicted from her mom's house, having difficulty finding a new place (with bad credit, and now a possible eviction). She was proud and happy she got approved for a First Premier card on the phone today with my wife. I had to comment that was another bad decision, they are the scum of the earth, but she seems to not want to listen to anyone (Whatever, I'll do what I want!). She's had pay day loans, and keeps doing broke people stuff. She's had a BK before as well.

She calls every day or at least every other day to rant how things aren't going well, but a lot of it is self destructive/bad decision behavior.

 

I think I just wanted to rant, and curious if anyone else had a friend (30+) that would not listen to anyone either. 

 

Or if we are approaching this wrong and have other suggestions.


Thanks.

Edited by scott31337

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Those are the kind of people who find their way out of my life after a while. It's tiring to put up with those kinds of conversations nonstop. Also you should keep in mind that people generally end up with the same habits as their friends. So be careful how much of this broke person mentality you allow to infiltrate your head. 

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9 hours ago, scott31337 said:

Good day.

My wife's friend/bridesmaid (B) (her age as well, 34ish, went to high school together) keeps doing broke people stuff.

We've known her credit has been bad for a while, and even around a year ago we offered to make her an AU to help rebuild and look over her credit report, she passed.

Now she's about to get evicted from her mom's house, having difficulty finding a new place (with bad credit, and now a possible eviction). She was proud and happy she got approved for a First Premier card on the phone today with my wife. I had to comment that was another bad decision, they are the scum of the earth, but she seems to not want to listen to anyone (Whatever, I'll do what I want!). She's had pay day loans, and keeps doing broke people stuff. She's had a BK before as well.

She calls every day or at least every other day to rant how things aren't going well, but a lot of it is self destructive/bad decision behavior.

 

I think I just wanted to rant, and curious if anyone else had a friend (30+) that would not listen to anyone either. 

 

Or if we are approaching this wrong and have other suggestions.


Thanks.


Shifter is, of course, right.

 

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink.  
 

To preserve the friendship, I'd leave her be and let her ruin her life.  Maybe when she hits rock bottom, she'll see the light.  Maybe not.

 

Since she isn't a family member, there probably isn't much else you can do.  Were it a family member, physical violence works wonders.  😂

Edited by PotO

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Some people thrive on their own drama and the attention it brings. 

 

I have zero patience for self-induced problems, unless the person is actively and legitimately committed to turning things around.  Some people are not, and never will be.  

 

Edit her out of your lives.  

 

If your wife insists on hanging out with her, that doesn't mean you have to...  just make 100% sure that you and your wife are in agreement on how to run your own household finances, and have a system to hold yourselves and each other to the plan.

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You can't fix stupid anymore than you can force a horse to drink after you led it to the trough.  The fiscally irresponsible who continue to make poor decisions are not going to learn.  All you can do is ensure you never co-mingle finances with them.

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