My wife's sister has been using her SSN to apply for credit! What steps do we need to take to fix this?

[tobettercredit]

if a note is signed "under seal" there is no statute of limitations, as I understand it.

 

She could also sign a note with a 7 year repayment schedule with interest that mirrors the credit cards by reference with a balloon payment that will be renegotiated at the end of the term.

 

I wouldn't just give up on the sister repaying the bulk of it. Clearly she has been paying for some time and appears to have an income. I think that a little moral suasion with a stick re fraud (by the OP, not the lawyer) might work wonders. We don't know if she has expressed remorse and shame or if she is defiant and devious. As said, we need the OP to fill out the story and how the wife came to know of debt. Did she order a credit report, did she get a turn down on a card SHE applied for, did she suspect something or see a huge credit card bill at her sister's house, Perhaps the sister came to her in shame or fear. Or perhaps she lost her job... OP, we need more information to know what can be done in conjunction with the sister... At the very least, if you have a note you can write off $3K/ year as an uncollectable debt on your taxes but you need a note and a break out of its substantiation.

 

you also need to talk to an accountant. every bit helps. I would def refinance the debt on a BT if you are able to do that...however, she may have shot your credit. Would the parents be willing to help the sister repay at all? just throwing shitola against the wall to see what sticks.

"As said, we need the OP to fill out the story and how the wife came to know of debt."

 

Mizliz, you're over intellectualizing this.

 

This is simply the accomplishment of Murphy's Law.

 

She gave her the social security number to open credit cards. OP said that.

 

The sisters might have also been authorized users on each other accounts.

[ICANHASMUNY?]

Don't forget the Newbies who are stating the OP has criminal intent because he's asking for advice on Fixing the situation the DW & SIL got themselves into....

 

We all come here for advice on how to fix our credit and our debts.

 

 

& He's already received the best advice;

 

change the address, get the cards back, freeze reports, pay it off somehow.

 

 

 

[tobettercredit]

I love all these armchair lawyers

 

who are suddenly fraud experts

 

and have it all figured out...

There is no fraud. All they need to do is PAY or file BK.

[RussInGotham]

I love all these armchair lawyers

 

who are suddenly fraud experts

 

and have it all figured out...

There is no fraud. All they need to do is PAY or file BK.

 

Filing for bankruptcy is not a casual decision. Advice on this thread may cause more harm than good. The OP needs to see a lawyer ASAP.

[ubercat]

The OP needs to see a lawyer ASAP.

 

I agree 100%.

[tobettercredit]

 

 

I love all these armchair lawyers

 

who are suddenly fraud experts

 

and have it all figured out...

There is no fraud. All they need to do is PAY or file BK.

 

Filing for bankruptcy is not a casual decision. Advice on this thread may cause more harm than good. The OP needs to see a lawyer ASAP.

 

Harm is already done. The best way to repair harm is to continue paying as before, not seeing a lawyer.

 

"The OP needs to see a lawyer ASAP." Only if they came to the decision to file BK.

 

Those who are assuming that there is fraud here are wrong.

 

The real issue here is of debtors trying to escape(absolve of)their responsibility.

 

The sisters may have been authorized users/ co-applicants and maybe one charged more than agreed.

[ubercat]

Those who are assuming that there is fraud here are wrong.

 

You seem awfully sure that OP knows the entire story...

[MickeyChick]

 

Those who are assuming that there is fraud here are wrong.

 

You seem awfully sure that OP knows the entire story...

 

i was just thinking... I wonder if the debt is actually the wife's and she just had the cards/bills sent to the sister's house?

Either way, there's been lost of advice and discussion, but OP hasn't been back on to share any more info.

[mizliz1011]

What would Mother Theresa say?

[ICANHASMUNY?]

This thread is going nowhere;

 

OP has advice, and is not likely to post all the details

 

Just Off topic infighting between member's on who has the best advice, or opinion.

 

suggested that it is closed.

[ubercat]

What would Mother Theresa say?

 

"Can I taste your feet?"

[Konrad2012]

What would Mother Theresa say?

"Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person"

 

Do you think she was referencing house to house combat?

[moneypyts]

mizliz wrote:
"when you call a lawyer you will need..."

 

Not true if you're just cold calling, fishing around.

 

OP is probably pretty stressed at this point, and could use some "global" information to help him sleep better at night.

 

Certainly gathering all this info will need to be done, but no point in waiting a month to get it before fishing around for legal advice, and finding out which offices/specialties might be suitable for follow-up calls later.

 

MP

[tobettercredit]

 

Those who are assuming that there is fraud here are wrong.

You seem awfully sure that OP knows the entire story...

 

Not trying to argue but I am sure OP knows but he's not revealing the whole story.

 

We have provided to OP the kind of help/advise he needed and hopefully he'll act upon it and find a resolution.

 

We're still debating this because it is a teachable moment for some of us.

 

Do not give your social to your sister/brother/friend and allow them to open 10 credit cards under your name and run $35,000 in CC debt.

 

In some ways OP helped some of us avoid making the kind of mistake his DW made in our credit journey.

[cashnocredit]

Everyone loves to rubberneck. There but for the grace of God, etc. What's so compelling about the OP's initial post is what awful choices were made by the wife and sister. It's also clear the OP, wife, and presumably sister understand how bad those decisions were.

 

The lessons learned here are:

 

1. Don't allow someone else, even a close relative, to open and use credit cards in your name. It doesn't help them establish credit since it isn't on their credit reports.

2. The status of the accounts isn't visible to the owner since they aren't getting the statements. It would be visible if they subscribed to services like credit karma.

3. If the beneficiary abuses the credit cards beyond the account owner's expectation it can be hard on the relationship. It's not dissimilar to cosigning for something except that only the account owner is liable.

 

For anyone even thinking about this I would recommend Amex. They let you add AUs and limit the spend to whatever you are comfortable with on each AU. The AU also will have the account appear on their credit report so it helps them build credit history. The AU can even set up their own online accounts to see their spending and make payments. Helps establish good financial habits and can be easily monitored for signs of problems.

[tobettercredit]

Everyone loves to rubberneck. There but for the grace of God, etc. What's so compelling about the OP's initial post is what awful choices were made by the wife and sister. It's also clear the OP, wife, and presumably sister understand how bad those decisions were.

 

The lessons learned here are:

 

1. Don't allow someone else, even a close relative, to open and use credit cards in your name. It doesn't help them establish credit since it isn't on their credit reports.

2. The status of the accounts isn't visible to the owner since they aren't getting the statements. It would be visible if they subscribed to services like credit karma.

3. If the beneficiary abuses the credit cards beyond the account owner's expectation it can be hard on the relationship. It's not dissimilar to cosigning for something except that only the account owner is liable.

 

For anyone even thinking about this I would recommend Amex. They let you add AUs and limit the spend to whatever you are comfortable with on each AU. The AU also will have the account appear on their credit report so it helps them build credit history. The AU can even set up their own online accounts to see their spending and make payments. Helps establish good financial habits and can be easily monitored for signs of problems.

Well said.

[mizliz1011]

mizliz wrote:

"when you call a lawyer you will need..."

 

Not true if you're just cold calling, fishing around.

 

OP is probably pretty stressed at this point, and could use some "global" information to help him sleep better at night.

 

Certainly gathering all this info will need to be done, but no point in waiting a month to get it before fishing around for legal advice, and finding out which offices/specialties might be suitable for follow-up calls later.

 

MP

true, but he will need it to resolve it one way or another. These are the questions a lawyer will ask in a sitdown. Plus it would not hurt for him to have his numbers and info gathered into a concise fashion as opposed to presenting an incomplete picture...

 

When a situation is upsetting, it makes your choices clearer when you diagram the decision tree and list the information available and what is not available and what can be made available. For example, she can request copies of all statements going back which will give her a clearer vision of what happened and when and not get a BS story from sister...facts vs. drama. seeing it on paper vs playing out the story in his mind can be calming in that

there is what you know vs what you don't know and what you need to find out.

 

Another question is what is the relationship between the sisters? obviously strained but is it close if not honest...

Edited July 3, 2015 by mizliz1011

[ICANHASMUNY?]

Everyone loves to rubberneck. There but for the grace of God, etc. What's so compelling about the OP's initial post is what awful choices were made by the wife and sister. It's also clear the OP, wife, and presumably sister understand how bad those decisions were.

 

The lessons learned here are:

 

1. Don't allow someone else, even a close relative, to open and use credit cards in your name. It doesn't help them establish credit since it isn't on their credit reports.

2. The status of the accounts isn't visible to the owner since they aren't getting the statements. It would be visible if they subscribed to services like credit karma.

3. If the beneficiary abuses the credit cards beyond the account owner's expectation it can be hard on the relationship. It's not dissimilar to cosigning for something except that only the account owner is liable.

 

For anyone even thinking about this I would recommend Amex. They let you add AUs and limit the spend to whatever you are comfortable with on each AU. The AU also will have the account appear on their credit report so it helps them build credit history. The AU can even set up their own online accounts to see their spending and make payments. Helps establish good financial habits and can be easily monitored for signs of problems.

Well said.

 

 

Oh, and if you ever just happen to do this anyways, or even add folks as AU's

 

it's always helpful if;

 

1) tell your spouse

 

2) get credit monitoring and watch those balances.

[ubercat]

1) tell your spouse

 

Humans tell in bits and parts, usually only as much as needed. It is a rare human that spills their guts and pleads mercy.

[dansamy]

 

 

1) tell your spouse

Humans tell in bits and parts, usually only as much as needed. It is a rare human that spills their guts and pleads mercy.

It's easier to get forgiveness than it is permission!

[NoPresetSnarkLimit]

This thread is going nowhere;

 

OP has advice, and is not likely to post all the details

 

Just Off topic infighting between member's on who has the best advice, or opinion.

 

suggested that it is closed.

 

Agree: OP probably won't post further.

Disagree: This thread is as On-topic as any here.

Strongly Disagree: keep it bumped, keep it on the front page forever, there are some very valuable lessons here on what NOT to do and the value of open communication (missing in this case) between spouses.

[ubercat]

 

 

1) tell your spouse

Humans tell in bits and parts, usually only as much as needed. It is a rare human that spills their guts and pleads mercy.

It's easier to get forgiveness than it is permission!

 

 

"It's better to regret something you have done than something you haven't done."

[mizliz1011]

 

 

 

1) tell your spouse

Humans tell in bits and parts, usually only as much as needed. It is a rare human that spills their guts and pleads mercy.

It's easier to get forgiveness than it is permission!

 

 

"It's better to regret something you have done than something you haven't done."

 

priceless...

[cashnocredit]

Regretting is a giant waste of brain space.

[ICANHASMUNY?]

 

 

 

1) tell your spouse

Humans tell in bits and parts, usually only as much as needed. It is a rare human that spills their guts and pleads mercy.

It's easier to get forgiveness than it is permission!

 

 

"It's better to regret something you have done than something you haven't done."

 

 

Not in this case.... .