Jump to content

Please consider disabling your adblocker for CreditBoards if you have not already done so.  This site depends on advertising revenue to stay online.


Sign in to follow this  

Would you date a man with 9 adopted kids?

This message is 749 days old.  We'd prefer it if you'd start a new topic instead of replying to this one.

Single Women: Would you date a man (who's wife passed away) who has 9 adopted kids (ages 4-17) and smokes daily?  

30 members have voted

  1. 1. Would you date a man who has 9 adopted kids?

    • yes
      2
    • no
      20
    • I'm not a single woman so this does not apply.
      6
    • unsure
      2


Recommended Posts

If you met a man with 9 adopted kids, who's wife had passed away due to illness, would you date him?

 

Also, this man smokes cigarettes daily, would that be a factor in your decision?

 

I'm talking about an average looking guy who earns a good living to support himself but is definatly not rich. He gets some assistance from the state for 7 of the kids due to special needs (since they are older and different race).

 

He and his wife adopted the kids together and of course never knew she would not be around to help raise them.

 

How do most women feel about this? If you already have kids, or not, I would like to hear your opinion. Would you stay away or would you give this guy a chance?

 

If so, would you date him with thoughts that it might one day turn into marriage or just for short term?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know that I wouldn't have it in me to be a good mother figure to those kids, so no.

 

I was (am!) a good mom to the one I have, and probably could have handled 1 or 2 more, but 9? I definitely don't have the patience/organizational skills required.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

yes..as long as he wasn't just looking for a mother for his children...I think its an admirable quality for a man to raise kids by themselves..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I voted no.

 

Smoking - dealbreaker.

 

Nine kids? Most likely not, but would need more details - what are their ages, what kind of "special needs" are we talking about, etc. There would have to be a MAJOR connection long before the "dating" stage to make me even consider it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I voted no.

 

Smoking - dealbreaker.

 

Nine kids? Most likely not, but would need more details - what are their ages, what kind of "special needs" are we talking about, etc. There would have to be a MAJOR connection long before the "dating" stage to make me even consider it.

ditto. smoking gross!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

mini,

 

During the day while they are in school he could get to know someone through going out to lunch.

 

brazen,

 

The oldest 3 have ADD. The oldest group is a sibling group of 7 so that is the main reason why the adoption was considered "special needs".

 

Vibrant,

 

So even if everything else were good you'd still say smoking would be a dealbreaker, huh?! That is a nasty habit. Something to think about.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It just all seems like. Too much. I think it takes special people to take in that many kids, a special person to go through the death of a spouse and continue raising those kids. Of course he deserves to be happy and meet someone if he is ready, but wow.... it's just a lot.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Vibrant,

 

So even if everything else were good you'd still say smoking would be a dealbreaker, huh?! That is a nasty habit. Something to think about.

 

Yep, absolutely a dealbreaker. The occasional wedding cigar or a cigarette while out with the boys is one thing, but don't do it around me, and brush your teeth before you try and kiss me. :lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Tee,

 

You bring up some good points.

 

The positive would be that he is a good hearted person who cares enough to adopt 9 kids.

 

You are right about the smoking part.

 

He is not poor by any means but not rich either. He does not have trouble paying the bills though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I love kids of all sizes and ages, so I voted yes. If anything serious developed, I would hope he would consider quitting smoking...I did and understand how hard it is, but i cannot stand the smell.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

No...although admittedly, this hypothetical stops at the 'man' part :lol:

 

But for the sake of the question...

 

I wouldn't date anyone with that many kids (one tends to be my limit) and I definitely would not date someone who smoked on a regular basis. The caveat is that I know some people view my cats the same way I view rugrats.

 

My ex smoked but only did so outside. I was able to tolerate her kid since the kid socialized better with people over 25 than she did with kids her own age.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I do not apply, however since you asked for opinions, I will give it.

 

I would give such a man a chance. Despite the smoking (which I would encourage him to quit... maybe we could both quit together! :lol: )

 

I think a man such as this, is so very special and obviously loving that to have found him, I would make danged sure I didn't loose him. Adopting an entire sibling group of SEVEN kids so they could stay together? I think I :swoon: him myself! ADD as special needs??? Haaaa! That's nothing to deal with.

 

YMMV, but with a man like this, at least you know what he's made of. There aren't too many "ifs" and he is proven in his loyalty and dedication to his family. A Win in my book 100%.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The smoking disqualifies him for me. Not because it stinks, but because it causes disease and is expensive.

 

The kids are fine. It doesn't matter to me one way or the other that they are adopted (other than the money from the state).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
This message is 749 days old.  We'd prefer it if you'd start a new topic instead of replying to this one.

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  




  • Today's Birthdays

  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      178,621
    • Most Online
      2,046

    Newest Member
    DymonStudded
    Joined

About Us

Since 2003, creditboards.com has helped thousands of people repair their credit, force abusive collection agents to follow the law, ensure proper reporting by credit reporting agencies, and provided financial education to help avoid the pitfalls that can lead to negative tradelines.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Guidelines