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NotAGreenDress

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  1. Can't use the f-word or s-word, but sweet tea-related slurs about a woman you don't like.... that's permitted.
  2. I don't know what went on between this couple any more than any of you do. We see what's in the videos, and that's about it. It will fall on deaf ears for some here, but there's a lot more complexity to domestic violence and why people don't leave their abusers than gold digging.
  3. Bingo. The NFL has more harsh reality to face if they think they're truly addressing domestic violence... by only responding to publicly-released video proof of it. Unfortunately, this will all be dumped on Rice because the NFL is a multi billion dollar industry, and people will go to the ends of the earth to protect it.
  4. At some point, the shorter list will be companies & systems that haven't been compromised. And for them, it's just a matter of time.
  5. So, I re-read what I wrote and while it wasn't my intention to pry or offend, I see that I came off as presumptuous and snotty... and I need to apologize. Had the OP been standing in front of me, I would (and should) have been much nicer and more diplomatic. jamal muin, I'm sorry for the way I responded to you, and hope there are no hard feelings.
  6. That's why I'm asking - because almost everyone does have debt here in common, yet this gentleman seemed to be uninformed on one of the basics... that an eviction has strong consequences. And I wasn't the only one surprised by it. So I'm asking for clarification on where he's coming from - maybe there's some other reason why that shouldn't apply to him. While I'm not fully aware of the requirements for section 8, it's certainly not weird. I'm glad that these programs exist for those that need them. The only issue I have with assistance of this type is when people take unfair advantage... and that's not an issue here. As for your comment on people not deserving to fix their credit - that's just not part of anything I said, or believe.
  7. No sanctimony, and certainly none about debt (though we don't know that that's why the initial rent was unpaid). But surprise, yes. Not that someone was unable to make a rent payment, but that he was unaware of what effect it might have on his record and future opportunities for housing. That's why I asked him to walk through his thought process... I'm actually curious about how he arrived at questioning this issue. It feels like there's some missing elements here, hence all my questions.
  8. ..."Just"? Seriously? What is it you see as strong, valid reasons to evict, if not for non-payment? Well now I'm curious if there are any other places you owe money, since you qualified it so specifically. And, okay, you paid off the debt, but it doesn't negate the fact that you were still evicted... and that's on your record. So why question whether it's legal to hold that against you? Why shouldn't the rules apply to you? That's a serious question... I'd like to know why you think you shouldn't be held responsible for something you did. Paying it back after the fact was good, but it doesn't change the fact that you failed to pay at the time.... making it necessary to evict you. So what's your reasoning here? Walk through it for me please.
  9. You and your (now-ex) girlfriend suck at communicating... both as individuals and especially as a couple. Whether you (or she) wanted marriage, kids, a house, to live in a yurt with a chicken coop... you should have told your partner, and it should have been discussed. Cheating aside (and yes, that's critical as well), that's where your relationship fell apart - from lemonade-poor communication. Neither of you needs to be with anyone until you figure that part out.
  10. I can't help but think that somewhere... out *there*, there's a running count of GDF posts for each of us, along with all those missing socks.
  11. Um, have you seen what's happened here when folks start posting jpegs and gifs on threads with so-called "trolls"?
  12. You don't want to hear this, but, pay him back in full - that's just the right thing to do in my opinion, and it's the only thing that will rightfully get him out of your life. You signed a contract and didn't fulfill it. There doesn't seem to be any real fault on his end - you just don't like him. There are some elements in your favor... he was way older than you and should have known you'd have trouble paying back such a large amount. He's also allowed you to get away with not paying. But none of that negates the contract. So get an extra job, sell some stuff and borrow if you can. The guy sounds like a sap, but he's been good to you. He deserves fair treatment, and deserves to get his money in full. And you should have to do like the rest of the adult world, own up and pay your debts. Is there an SOL on private, person-to-person loans? I don't know - maybe someone else can chime in on that. On a personal note (which you obviously can ignore), some tough-love: your excuses make me want to slap you. He creeps you out and "work is hard!". Oh cry me a river, you whiny little child. YOU are taking advantage of a sad sack... that makes you a sucky person. I suspect you're not sucky, and don't want to be... so grow up, own up and take care of your self and your business. Stop trying to wiggle out by paying short. If you handle the rest of your life and other people like this, one day it's going to hit you back - and hit hard. You don't want that... and I don't want it for you. Or for anyone else who deals with you. You can try to offer him the settlement that you suggest. If you're writing a settlement contract on your own without legal advice, keep it professional, and require both signatures. Have a friend/family member or two with you whenever you meet with him (always in a public place) and have them sign the contract as witnesses. Make it clear that this settlement erases the debt and upon signature, voids the initial contract. If he signs, this covers you legally and he cannot pursue you for this debt in the future. From what you've told us, he has no reason to accept a settlement. He doesn't need the repayment and has a signed document that you owe more than twice the amount you're offering, and are delinquent in paying. Plus, there's a danger that this move could alert him to your attempt to cut contact. What will he do with that? He wants to keep in contact with you... so if he's smart, he'll counter-offer for you to make monthly payments. If that happens, I don't know what other recourse you have. But if your luck continues and he stays true to the doormat that he's been for you all along - he'll give you what you want, even if you really don't deserve it.
  13. Okay, so you've grown up a bit and realize a few things. Good. I feel like we might be missing some of the story perhaps, so a couple of questions: Not that it's any of our business, but why the urgency? Why the "ASAP" need to get out from under this guy (heh!) after five years? You want to sever the connections so he has zero reason to contact you. Got it. How are you going to accomplish that by, in effect, asking him for money again? Asking him to take less than the amount you agreed to pay is the same as asking him for a $4000+ gift. Since he doesn't seem to need the money you owe with any immediacy... why would he agree to this? Unless it's to do you a big favor, which is what you don't want.

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