Well, I'm just not really happy with where I'm at. I'm able to pay my bills, but not much else.

Here's my monthly breakdown.

Bills

Rent $200/mo
Electric + gas $120/mo
Water $60/mo
Cable/Phone $70/mo

Total 450

Debt

Line of Credit 25/mo Balance 440
Visa 40/mo Balance 1,450
Citi 125/mo Balance 5,695
Truck Payment 46/mo Balance 379
Lowe's 15/mo Balance 409
Home Depot 10/mo Balance 195
Sam's 15/mo Balance 570
Amex 36/mo Balance 1,746

Monthly Debt Payments 312 Total Debt $10,884


Total Bills 762

Doesn't look too bad so far, so let's get into a little bit more detail.....

Monthly fuel $140 Avg $35/wk Driving back and forth to work

So, add that to the total and we get $902/mo going out.

Monthly income is around $1080.00


I've tried for the last six months to get my wife to get a job, and have had no luck. We have 3 kids, and her opinion is that day care will eat up everything that she works for. This poses a good argument, and both sides of our family agree with her. So I just gave up on having any help with the bills, and figure I'll be going it alone.

I will add that I absolutely hate everything about my job. It's part time, working 30 hours a week doing industrial sales. My boss is so lazy that even though he sits 2 feet away from the fax machine, he waits until I'm walking through and hands me a paper and asks me to fax it for him. (Unfortunately this is true, I wish I were joking about it.)

I keep pretty bummed about it. I would love to leave my job and get something full time with benefits, but the job market is pretty dire here.

Any advice would be great.

You can't squeeze blood from a stone. I'm amazed you can maintain a family of 5 on $1000 a month. I couldn't support myself alone on that.

You need more income and a better job. How you do that I don't know. Sales skills are usually thought to be transferable, can you get a better sales job somewhere? Or is selling the part you hate?

Hate to be the one to point this out but you'd be making considerable more money if you had a minimum wage job, full time. Seriously isn't there something you can do for even $8 or $10 an hour? That would be an improvement in income, and you are light years away from having to start paying any income taxes.

I'm making $10/hour now, just stuck at 30 hours a week. They have somebody from another store coming in one day a week, so that way they can have somebody in the store for 40 hours a week, but don't have to give up the full time benefits.

I don't mind the sales part, even though my experience is mainly inside sales. I handle a few accounts that I go call on, but the general manager still gets paid commission off of it. It seems as though most employers want a college degree of some type, along with the experience. This is one of the main things that hurts me.

I've done media sales for several years part time. It seems to me that if you can really sell, almost any other deficiency can be forgiven.
Have you considered putting together an info sheet on yourself and seeing what else is out there? I know folks who easily bring home 6 figures selling without a day in school beyond HS. Perhaps it's different in other types of sales, I haven't any experience in industrial stuff.

Can the wife get a part time job at night when your not working?

Well then if you are only working 30 hours, get a second job at McDonalds or something like that. Actually sounds like you could double your income without putting in any more effort that a whole lot of people experience, just by having a 2nd part time job.

Also, how old are the kids anyway? Do they really need day care? Just ask because nowadays seems lots of parents are overly terrified to let their 14-year-olds be home alone.

In the right circumstance, waitressing can pay pretty well and isn't often a full time proposition. Could be just a weekend thing. Or perhaps some sort of work at home deal?

I get the feeling that OP may be feeling a bit resentful about being the only source of income? I guess OP could add a second job on to his schedule which would help with the money issue, but not the equality of financial responsibility part of it.

Your wife should either get a job that pays better than what you'd pay for day care or she should be a day care provider.

You should get a better paying job; until then, a second job will suffice.

Get over the fact that your boss is lazy; he pays for that privilige. Your wife however, does not.

I have three kids, and right now with two in school f/t and one at home, I would be breaking even on daycare costs at roughly 30,000/year. That is a typical secretary/admin. assistant salary.

HOWEVER, I work weekends when DH is home which brings in a small chunk of money to help pay off some of our larger debt. It seems to me this would be a good solution - 15 hours/weekend could help a lot. Heck, even Walmart is willing to have people work weekends only.

I agree with the pp that OP feels resentful about his wife not working - it can be tough when you are carrying the load. Daycare really does eat up the money, but that doesn't mean she couldn't get something PT to help out too.

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? The reason I ask is have you ever thought of joining the military? You are making less than what you would as an E-1 (the lowest rank) and you would be living in base housing so you wouldn't be paying rent. You can go any branch, but if your looking at not deploying alot, go Air Force. Lotta good jobs that you gain great experience for the outside.

Her opinion is crap. I ran through this same thing with my first wife. That just comes down to laziness. Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with Stay at Home Mom's, but when there is only $10k a year coming in for 5 people, something more needs to be done. What you aren't taking into account is the fact that if she has a job, in most jobs after a while you usually get a pay raise. Even if she is making $100 more a month than what you are paying out for daycare, that is still an extra $1k a year that you didn't have before. That's adding 10% more income to the household.

And what is with day care nowadays, just 20 years ago when I was 8 my parents were giving a girl 5 bucks an hour to babysit or the old lady up the street with the big yard $20 a day to watch me play with a stick or some mud and give me bologna sandwiches and kool-aid for lunch.

I'm a stay at home mom and my dh works 40 hrs a week. We've look at what it would cost for me to work m-f daytime hours and with one in daycare full-time and the other would need before, after, no school, and summer the cost is just to much. My oldest wouldn't need daycare. So for extra income I donate plasma 2x a week and I can schedule my appointments online. It takes about 1 1/2 hours but I read a book the whole time. I think of it as my quiet time away from the kids. Some people use their laptops even (my DH does). We each bring in about $200 a month so that's an extras $400. It's really come in handy since my dh was unemployed for 6 weeks and the job he has now may only be temporary (we'll find out in Oct./Nov. if he gets hired on).

Could either one of you pick up a paper route? The people who do our area are a couple and they take turns. We are in a driving route area so sometimes one will drive and the other will put the paper in the box. They don't even have to get out because everyone in town has mail/paper boxes on the side of the road.

Have you though of going back to school? With my DH losing his job earlier this year he's looking at going back starting in Jan. He can go at night if he does have a permanent job by then. He's going to use financial aid, scholarships (if he can), and student loans. The job he lost wasn't the first one that the company has gone under so he figures it's time to go to college.

Other flexible jobs if your wife was going to work would be housekeeping at a hotel (can do weekends only) or office cleaning (it's usually at night).

I agree with this, particularly the bold. If your kids are under age 6 (or even 2 under this age), I think your wife is pulling her fair share of the load and saving you all money. 30 hrs a week for a family of 5 is just not cutting it though.

Where do you live that a family of five can rent something (anything!?) for $200/month? And, have you posted your complete budget? Do you buy groceries? Do you insure your truck? Are you continuing to add to your credit card balances?

I was gonna say...there's no FOOD in this budget. Something's not adding up.

Food stamps I bet.

Not sure if posted, but can't the two sides of the family watch the kid while they are both at work?

run the math.

cut down on the insults.

And a gallon of gas cost about 80 cents. It isn't 1989 anymore.

OP you are managing very well considering limited income flowing in and a family of five. A part-time job for DW may not be that costly if you can arrange her hours for the evening/weekend. Temping, CS, retail, fast food if need be. Not sure whether there are state regulations for this, but doing a home daycare thing may be another way to bring in the extra money if she is firm about SAHM until kids can be enrolled in the district pre-K. Make sure you carry liability coverage.
Perhaps for the kid(s) who aren't old enough for pre-K/K, sharing a sitter or agreeing with another family/families to babysit for each other can cut costs allowing your spouse to work part-time.
Having a frank talk with spouse to discuss shared effort to bring the family into a more comfortable financial position can go a long way.

I was in your position not that long ago in terms of money coming in and out and I am well educated. My boss was like yours but worse, much worse. Let's see where I can start:

1) If you are getting foods stamps, great! the program was created for people just like you. You are working and doing the best under the circumstances. Poor nutrition causes health issues and more cost to us tax payers. If you are not getting food stamps, go for it?

2) I worked part-time when my kid where younger and I kid you not, most of my income went to the sitter, then gas, professional outfits for work, lunch.... I understand it you are resentful but trust me, the kids will be older soon and DW can do something then. For now, can she sell avon or anything else particulalry if she knows other moms. Can she sell stuff on Ebay? clip coupons? can you talk and come up with some alternative to help with cash flow, cut down the CC use?

3) I started out saying that I was in your position, put yourself out there, start interviewing with the knowledge that you have something valuable to offer! Work on getting a nice work environment with pay raises, benefits and a decent boss. I would say, also post your resume on those free job sites, like monster.com. Really put yourself out there with confidence. I did just that and use positive thinking and worked on attracting a great job situation, cost me nothing, I just accepted a job for a substanctial amount of money.

Keep us posted, many, many people are in your situation and your sharing helps others.

when I was under-employed and had just filed BK I did an international job search and found a much better paying job and moved a couple thousand miles. My salary is probably 50% more than it would have been if I remained in the former job.

Hmm, you don't have much to work with, but I'll try to throw out some suggestions.

Are you doing your best to conserve electricity, gas, and water? You know, using minimal lights during the day, making sure they are off when you leave a room, etc? Is your a/c blasting all the time, even when it's nice outside? Maybe wearing less clothing would help or simply opening up the windows. Have you checked to make sure there are no water leaks (dripping faucets, etc) and that your toilet doesn't run constantly? Do you live in a house and can turn down the temp on your water tank?

Is that the best/cheapest cable and phone package you can get? I'm also assuming that your internet is included in that price. I'd evaluate how much television you actually watch and see if you can get your programs through alternative methods, such as netflix, online (netflix, hulu, websites of the channels), or your local library. If your phone is a traditional landline setup, ditch all the bells and whistles and pick up an answering machine. If it's a cable phone, I have no experience with that. If it's cell, see if you're actually making the most of your plan. If you're not, I'd look into getting a pay-as-you-go phone.

As far as the debt goes, you have several cards that have low amounts and I'd try to knock some of those off quickly. Is there anything you own that you want to get rid of and could sell? I'm not talking about anything big, but just the small stuff that everyone seems to accumulate. Are you saving your spare change? That sounds silly, but it seems to add up in our house.

Is taking public transportation an option in your area? If so, you could do that a couple of days a week to save on gas.

First off, thanks for all the replies everybody.

My wife just turned her paperwork in and got fingerprinted to be a substitute teacher. When everything comes in, she'll make $55 a day working 7:00am-1:45pm. I told her that this would be great, but since it's not permanent she needs to continue searching for a job.

The two oldest kids are in school now, only leaving our 15 month old needing a sitter during the day.

As far as the job goes, I've decided it's time to move on to better things. I'll only be working there until I find something else. The company has done a few more shady things that really made me realize that I'm better off leaving there.

As far as the bills go, The electric bill for last month was $144 dollars. I about went through the roof when I saw that.

The CC's are put up, and will not be used. I'm sure I'm forgetting some stuff, I'll keep this thread updated with what's going on.

Thanks again.

Your wife not working seems to be a real rub for you, and I can understand. I'd say the first thing to do, if you haven't already, is actually call around and see what daycare costs would be in your area. Many daycares have greatly reduced rates for afterschool care. You have to have concrete numbers before you can actually determine if it's cheaper for her to stay home. If you're working 30 hours a week, you're home over 130 hours per week. Surely there are part time jobs either of you could take during that time which wouldn't leave the kids alone. Another thing to look into might be working at an actual daycare. She'd probably get free or greatly reduced rates for the young child, would still get to "watch" it, and would be bringing in money. But you need hard numbers. One additional thought though, she's probably not going to be happy if you put these numbers together and "make" her work.

Good for her. That is a step in the right direction for both of you.

You guys are going to do fine!

I don't know anyone else who can itemize their monthly expenses with such precision.

I spend hundreds of thousands a year, and have no budget, and barely a clue as to where it all goes.

I know a whole lot goes on starbucks, though.

Keith

So now that you are both working and sharing financial responsibilities are you also now sharing parenting and household responsibilities? i.e. laundry, dishes, grocery shopping and all of the other day to day responsibilities that homemakers are usually responsible for?

If your wife going back to work was the best decision for the family, and you made it together, great. But if that means she's just now working and still taking care of all of the responsiblities of a stay-at-home homemaker, I think she might become resentful in the future.

My parents have been married for thirty one years. My mother worked the first couple of years while we were young and then became a stay-at-home homemaker. When my mother was working, she and my father got into the biggest fights over the fact that he didn't share the workload at home despite the fact that she worked as well.

I hope things are more equitable in your situation and I wish you the best of luck.