chrism5150

But if you had charged it, you couldve charged it back when it was crappy (Hey, SOMEONE has to pipe in the BBQ response, dammit! )

Sorry, I was going to let this thread die off, but I have to respond to this... 1) There is no "underlying issue". As I said, we have been going around and around about the car for months. Every time a couple has an argument or disagreement doesn't mean you have to call in Dr Phil. 2) The "real reason" I over-reacted is we have been going around and around for months about it. Personally, I think it was the "immovable object vs irresistible force" scenario: I didnt want to back down, and neither did she...something had to give. Fortunately, we both recognized that at about the same time. 3) No, we dont argue in front of our child. Never have, never will. He has enough problems to deal with without our adding to them. I can appreciate your concern for him, but please dont presume to lecture me on parenting my child when you have no idea about our situation. I appreciate everyone's responses (yes, even the flames). I posted it here hoping to get a female perpective on the issue, and got it. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming, starring Ron Jeremy and BBQ123

But then she would've lost her own personal "Geek Squad", so I guess the cost outweighed the benefits

I disputed him...so we're waiting for AmEx to investigate

Update....the problem took care of itself. When I got home last night, all prepared to apologize, she beat me to it! She took the car yesterday and had it detailed inside and out, and told me that she thought it was unfair of her to not take better care of the car, after she had promised she would, and that from here on, she was not going to let it get to that point again. Of course, being the wonderful human I am (LOL), I apologized for overreacting the way I did, she accepted, and then later...the fun part of making up

That's what I keep saying to her...if you just tossed the trash whenever you stop, it wont ever be a problem. But, whatever. Ive decided I have too many other things to worry about to get worked up like I did over this. Ive decided Im going to volunteer her to drive her mother to the grocery store once a week...once Mom starts on her, then the problem will be solved

OK, let's just be honest here... How many of us are over 30? (raises hand) How many remember those films and lectures in school about how pot was a "gateway drug"? (me again) How many of us have at least TRIED it? (me) And how many of us are now hardcore heroin addicts, mugging lil ol ladies to get our next fix? (NOT me) The ONLY 2 reasons pot is illegal are: 1) The government hasnt found a way to tax it properly 2) No Congressman or Senator wants to vote to legalize it, thus being cast as "soft on the drugs that are killi ng our country" The drug laws in this country are making criminals out of ordinary citizens, while we send billions of dollars in aid to South American governments that produce and ship the stuff to us.

Thank you! That is an EXCELLENT idea.

I drive my 9 yr old son (who has autism) and his two classmates (who also have autism, and other various disablilites) 40 miles each way to a special-needs Cub Scout troop meeting every week. I also take him all over the city regularly. I attend every parent-teacher meeting, raise money for Cure Autism Now, have turned down 2 promotions in 2 years because they would involve too much time away from him. When it was "Bring Your Child to Work" day, guess who was the only father to bring his child with him? Not trying to toot my own horn, but I get defensive about the whole parenting issue, especially when it is just assumed that the wife/mother does all the parenting.

Well, the whole point of buying the new car was that she would have something safe and reliable to drive. My son has a lot of medical appointments, and I was uncomfortable with them riding around in the beater ( it has a blown head gasket AND warped heads, so really not worth repairing; Im just driving it til it dies). On the other hand, all the ladies here are right about my overreacting, and I DO deserve all the flaming here. However, what would you suggest as an alternative? I have cleaned it myself repeatedly when it got to the point where I couldnt stand it anymore. And Im not talking a little piece of paper or lint, Im talking LAYERS of garbage. I've taken it directly from the car wash home and said "This is what I mean" when she said she didnt know what I meant by cleaning the car. Ive told our son repeatedly "NO eating or drinking in the new car" and then she turns around and tells him its ok, we just wont tell Dad. I ask her why she hasnt and her response is "I forgot" or "I havent had time". My feeling is, if you keep it up, it never gets to the point of being trashed out. It IS infuriating, since we have never financed a car, and I would like it to be worth SOMETHING in a few years when its paid off.

My head is both bloody and bowed. This is why I sought the wise counsel of the CB family. I am going home today, apologizing for freaking out, and trying this again.

You guys are absolutely right that I approached it the wrong way. But we've had this argument many times, and I guess I was just fed up. To the poster who suggested asking how I can help, I HAVE. Ive done everything short of doing it myself. Ive bought wipes, trash bags, you name it. I certainly dont expect it to be at the level of a professional detailing, but at least trash-free. It just ticks me off that I will likely end up doing it myself, and it will be trashed out again in a week. Not only that, but IMHO she's teaching our son that its ok to trash out whatever, Daddy will come behind you and clean it up. The "my inspection" thing is kind of a family joke -- that's how we end up doing the housework. She does the large things, then I come through and "detail" it, so we've always joked that "the living room is ready for your inspection". Didnt make that clear, and I can see how that would come off as a$$hole-like! And to the poster who suggested a professional detailer...DAMN good idea

We bought a new car (2004 Dodge Neon SXT) in February, basically for the wife to haul our son around to his various medical appointments, etc. I kept on using our beat-to-death Chev Cavalier for commuting to & from work. When we bought the car, the deal was, she would take care of the interior, and I would handle washing, waxing, maintenance, etc. The whole reason for even having to negotiate that was she has a history of trashing the insides of cars, and I am anal about keeping my cars up...hence, the deal. Well, I got home last night, noticed the back-door window was rolled down, opened the door to roll it up, and HOLY MOTHER OF GOD! French fries crushed into the back seat carpet, empty food wrappers everywhere, I mean just TRASHED. I went off. I told her (rather loudly, I admit) that she was NOT taking care of the car as promised, and that she had 24 hours to get it ready for MY inspection (another sore point between us..when I clean something, you could perform surgery on it without worrying about infection; she's the type who kicks everything under the bed and calls it "cleaning the bedroom"), or I was coming home and taking her keys away. Needless to say, this didnt go over very well...am I wrong? Suggestions? It just burns me up to make car payments every month on this when she's trashing it out. Especially when I have done everyhing I can think of to facilitate her keeping up the interior (bought a car trash container for the inside, packs of window wipes for the windows, Armor-All wipes for the dash, car vacuum that plugs into the lighter socket, etc)

I LOVE Google Earth! I used it to scan through a really rich, old-money area of the city (the kind of houses you dont buy, you inherit ), and me & the wife took a drooling drive through it..LOL

Wow, lots of us Philadelphia area wanna-be home buyers here! GO EAGLES!